It’s sad and a little stupid that they make doctors pledge to follow the advice of some Hippocratic Oaf. Doctors are smart well educated people. Why should they be bossed around by some oaf? How did he get to make all the rules? Even worse is that his rules are pretty lame. Like, you can’t poison people. Or sleep with your patients or their slaves. You can’t even talk about the all the problems your weirdo patients have to other people. That Hippocratic oaf takes most of the fun out of being a doctor.
In 1508 Pope Julius II hired Michelangelo to paint the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. He worked on it on and off for over thirty years. For the pope it was a refreshingly straight forward admission that church services are so boring that you have to paint the ceiling to give the congregation something to look at
They say that 2.3% of adults still have a bed wetting problem. I have no idea why, it’s really a pretty easy thing to do.
I’m against using human embryos for stem cell research, and I think that anyone who reads the whole bill would be too. They just assume that it’s be doctors doing the research, but most of the time the “research” will just be for second grade finger painting projects.
I like other people’s cats okay, but I wouldn’t wont one myself. Allowing some animal to crap in your house just seems like a mistake to me. My rule is that I’m the only one allowed to shit inside my home. As a bonus feature that also keeps visitors from hanging around my house for very long.
I read that members of the Masons have this secret handshake so they can tell who’s a Mason and who isn’t. The tradition dates back hundreds of years ago before name tags were invented.
I think that prostitution should be made legal because until then it’s practically impossible that the hooker industry will ever get into a price war. And how great would that be if there was one of those?
Most people don’t know this about me, but for three years I performed the role of ”Jellylorum” from “Cats” on Broadway. Not in a theater though. I usually did it way down the street on the sidewalk outside of a Korean market. My doctor thinks that my actions were probably caused by a chemical imbalance in my brain.
I think we need to all cut down on the amount of carbon dioxide we produce if we want to stop the greenhouse effect. So from now on I’m only going to exhale on every third breath. It’s actually pretty tricky to do that. It takes some getting used to, but I think it’s an important enough cause that it’s worth the effort.
I was supposed to get a CAT scan, but I decided not to because it’s so expensive. But now that I think about it, it must be really hard to hold an angry cat still with one hand while trying to operate the photo copier with the other. So I guess they might deserve all that money they charge after all. But I still don’t get why my doctor would ask me to get him a photocopy of a cat. The only possible reason I can think of it that he might be one of those “furries”. If that’s really the case I’m going to find another doctor.
When I went to camp some of the guys would try that “hand in warm water” prank to get someone who is sleeping to wet the bed. I had a better idea. Instead sneaking around with the bucket of water I just went ahead and pissed on the sleeping people myself. The results were just as good and it cut out the middleman.
